It’s hard to believe it’s 9 months since Hobbes died. We were forced to choose living after pet death. Why? We left to drive to Arizona 4 days later for a vacation.
We knew Hobbes could not make the trip. Until the night before he died, I schemed how we could take the car trip with him. Then I realized, what happened if he died on the road. And The Polar Vortex was due the next day!
So I asked Hobbes what he wanted. He replied he was ready to go. Life was getting to hard for him. Previously Hobbes and I discussed what he wanted in his remaining days.
As we spoke almost daily, Hobbes said he wanted to live life to the fullest and be with us as long as possible.
He also wanted help crossing The Rainbow Bridge with his favorite veterinary friends. Hobbes loved going to his friends who happened to be vets, chiropractors, physical therapists, etc.
Remember the vet said “on an average, dogs with his illness survive 11 days.” Hobbes gave us 148 days of joy and love. Even now, tears run down my face as I miss him and am so grateful for our “bonus” time.
For several days after Hobbes died, John and I put on our warm winter coats and walked Hobbes’ evening walk. It helped with some of the grief.
Before we left for Arizona, I picked up Hobbes’ ashes in a beautiful wooden box. For years, I recommended Pets Remembered to clients and now used their services. They were the perfect people to help us with Hobbes.
Hobbes wanted to “stay home” while we went to Arizona. He wanted to watch the house. And he did. His ashes took his spot watching over the living room.
When we came back to Minneapolis at the end of February, we often took our evening walks.
At first Hobbes wanted to be buried in the Minneapolis yard under a beautiful plant. He kept saying this until June when we were packing to move to Arizona. Then he wanted to go with us and find a spot in our new yard.
Now in Arizona, Hobbes’ ashes and collar are sitting near the fireplace in the living room. And soon we’ll find the special spot for him.
We’re meeting neighbors and always stop to say hello to the dogs we see. We ask neighbors to let their dogs stay with us when they travel. One family canceled their reservations at the wonderful local dog “hotel” to stay a long weekend with us. Now their dog tries to walk up our driveway when they walk by.
Another friends’ dog chased the hummingbirds on the deck. He went home very tired.
When asked if we have a dog, we pull out our phones and share Hobbes’ photos. Sometimes tears surprise me.
We still take our walks around the steep hills in the new neighborhood. Yes, we’re living after pet death. Everyone needs to do it at their own pace.
Once again, I’m the one living the experience I help so many people take. My favorite article for a grieving pet parent is this Washington Post article on “The death of a pet can hurt as much as the loss of a relative.” Another article explains why it “may be the most difficult time of your life.”
We’re healing from Hobbes death. Now we’re settled in Arizona and talking about another dog. We’ll see what happens.
Fortunately for us, I could ask Hobbes what he wanted and what he was feeling. Yes, we’re living after pet death — Hobbes death.
Ask me about animal communication and how it helps you make all sorts of decisions and helps your pet understand what is going on. I’m here to help you in any situation you’re facing with your pet – even living after pet death.
